imported>Shezza |
imported>NikNakFlak |
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| =Roleplay= | | =Roleplay= |
| <span style="color:#00FF00">''";Nya!"''</span> | | <span style="color:#00FF00">''";Nya!"''</span> |
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| = A Legit Guide to Felinids =
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| This legit guide is all about cat girls as a <s>5e D&D</s> racial option for everybody who’s not a fag and can
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| appreciate real art. We’ll start off with an FAQ for the aesthetically impaired. Enjoy!
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| Q: Why would I want to play as a cat girl?
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| A: That’s a fucking stupid question, but that’s OK – it’s probably to be expected of autistic antiweeb
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| crusaders such as people who would even bother reading this FAQ instead of just skipping to
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| the racial stats. The answer is that cat girls are a truly essential PC race in any and all <s>D&D</s> games.
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| In fact, they’re so essential to the game that in Chainedmale (Gary Gaygax’s first whack at the
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| universe’s 8th tabletop role-playing game ever made) they were the *only* player race available!
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| Not only that but, given people were such unimaginative fucks, the cat girl PC race was
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| simultaneously its own class. Well, at least Gary Gaygax understood the importance of cat girls!
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| Q: How can I incorporate cat girls into my setting?
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| A: Why aren’t cat girls already in your setting? What fucked up world do you have in which you
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| have dragons/wizards/nalfeshnees/emus/trees/xylophones/tiny people and yet you lack girls with
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| cat ears and tails? Dude just use magic or some shit. You don’t need this spoonfed to you.
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| Q: I want to play as a cat girl, but my <s>DM</s> admin won’t let me. What should I do?
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| A: Call him a faggot and then just play as a warlock, druid, or wizard and turn yourself into a cat
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| girl anyway. Starting at level two as a warlock, you can cast disguise self at will as an invocation.
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| Once you reach 15th level you can cast alter self at will as an invocation. Once you hit level 17 you
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| get true polymorph and you’re golden. As a moon druid, you get the Thousand Forms circle
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| feature at level 14, which lets you cast alter self at will a level earlier than warlock gets it, though
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| you’ll sadly never have access to true polymorph. As a wizard, you get access to all the normal
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| spells (disguise self, alter self, true polymorph) and, of course, wish. I can think of nothing more
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| worthy of a suicidal casting of wish than to turn each and every humanoid on the material plane
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| into a cat girl. The gods will surely smile upon your heroic sacrifice for the greater good.
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| Q: Why does everyone assume I’m a pervert just for wanting to play as a cat
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| girl?
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| A: Because they’re degenerate cocksuckers who cannot fathom that another person might have
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| pure intentions in wanting to play as the cat girl master race. Their wish-fulfillment fetish-tier
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| races like elves, aasimars, goliaths, and hobgoblins are perfectly fine in their mad, lust-filled minds,
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| such that the purity and perfection of cat girls burns at their evil perverted hearts.
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| Neko Revēlāt 57:20 - But the wicked are like the tossing sea; for it cannot be quiet, and its waters
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| toss up mire and dirt.
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| Q: Where are the cat boys?
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| A: I don’t follow.
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| Q: What is a cat girl’s favored class?
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| A: Cat girls make excellent barbarians because they are fast and possibly strong! Cat girls also
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| make great bards, due to the fact that they are charismatic and tend to have lovely voices. You
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| can’t go wrong with a cat girl cleric, as no other race produces such wise and devoted acolytes.
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| The path of a druid is one that suits a cat girl perfectly, as they are natural protectors and
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| nurturers of nature. Cat girl fighters may be found amongst the greatest warriors in any setting,
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| being innately talented martial combatants due to their speed and possible strength. The life of a
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| cat girl monk is one of sweat and discipline, and that suits a cat girl just fine since they have great
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| mental fortitude and physical talent. Cat girls make the very best paladins, as cat girls have a
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| potent sense of justice and dedication to righteous causes. The role of a ranger is one of a silent
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| guardian and watchful protector, which cat girls fill perfectly with their keen senses and rustic grit.
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| No other race offers you a better choice as a rogue, as the dexterity and cunning of cat girls is
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| unmatched in the world of intrigue, tactics and espionage. Innate magical power and talent flows
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| through the veins of every cat girl, making cat girls the ideal race for being sorcerers. Cat girls are
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| experts of diplomacy and finding alternative ways to make their dreams reality when things go
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| awry, making them superb candidates for finding their way into the warlock class. As intelligent
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| and studious as the average cat girl is, it’s no wonder that cat girls also make such top-of-the-line
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| wizards. I hope that answers your question!
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| That concludes this FAQ segment. I hope you now have a better understanding of the depth, utility,
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| and general import of cat girls as a D&D 5e PC race.
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| == Cat Girl Traits ==
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| Your cat girl character has many unique and potent traits inherent to your noble bloodline.
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| Ability Score Increases. Your Dexterity score increases by 2, and your Charisma score increases by 1
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| Age. Cat girls grow up at about the same rate as humans, reaching physical maturity generally in
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| their late teens. Cat girls, however, do not age after maturity, and can potentially live forever.
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| Even if she dies though, remember she will always live on in your heart.
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| Alignment. Cat girls are always good. No exceptions. If you suspect a cat girl is evil, you’re
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| mistaken – they are probably just pretending.
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| Size. Cat girls tend to range in height from just under 5 feet to just below 6 feet tall. Your size is
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| Medium.
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| Languages. Cat girls know English, which is the only language anyone needs.
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| A Cute. Cat girls are very cute! You can cast the enthrall spell once using this trait. You regain the
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| ability to do so when you finish a short or long rest. Charisma is your spellcasting ability for this
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| spell.
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| {{Jobs}}
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| [[Category:Backstory]]
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